When I asked my Japanese classmate, a former consultant, what she wanted to do when we graduate, she replied that she wanted my life.  But in her words, 

“I want to be a housewife, just like you”

I think it took me a few minutes to process that one.  And then I realized that she was being somewhat humorous, and was saying that she hopes to get married and “settle down” in a house as a wife.  You know, a housewife.  She has achieved much in her life and this position was the next one on her life goals list.

My status as a married person has much more significance to certain cultures than others.  As I was explaining this morning to another classmate about how sometimes we go all out for dinner at our place, and sometimes it is just bread and cheese, she was really perplexed.  

“You serve your husband bread and cheese for dinner?” she asked.

“Umm…yeah.  I mean, we kinda prepare it together”,  I replied.

“Yeah, where I come from in Zambia, that is just a less direct way to ask for a divorce.  A woman who is married is expected to cook a good meal for her family, regardless of her job or school or even if she is sick.  What does your family think about this?”

And I explained to her that my older family members are probably not proud of my role in the kitchen, but that our marriage is built on a foundation much stronger than domestic abilities.  I did reassure her that occasionally I make the effort for a good home cooked meal, and that he does the same as well, but I got the feeling that she was worried I would be fired from my job.  

Later on, as Pedram and I were eating delivery pizza together, I asked him if he married me because of my culinary skills.  His reply?

“You knew how to cook before we were married?”

Exactly.