Tag Archives: europe

A la francaise

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Last weekend, Pedram and I went to visit friends in Lyon, France.  Justine and Mathieu had recently moved there (Chambery to be precise) from Montreal, where we had all been neighbors.  It was good to reconnect with them.  I also reconnected with my long lost buddy, their son, Inaki.  Here we are in Montreal back in May 2011

And here we are in March 2012.

If Pedram didn’t have one on the way, he probably would have stolen this one.

You’ve probably heard how French people do everything better, right?  There is a huge American boom about writing in detail how the French manage to do all the things Americans long to do, but with their great snobby I-don’t-really-care attitude and their well, frenchiness.  This past weekend I witnessed it all with my own eyes, and I can tell you — it is all true.

French women do eat everything and do not get fat (like the book). Justine is skinnier than I have ever seen her, including her pre-baby days.  Her secret?  French cuisine.  The girl eats bread, cheese, croissants, coffee, decadent and hearty meals, crepes, galettes, mousse, tartiflette, etc, etc.  And she is tiny.  I, on the other hand, gained considerable weight on that same diet over 4 days.  In fact, that weekend, I “popped”, meaning my baby is like me and probably doubled its size during the weekend.

And did you read all the hype about how French parents are better?  It is true.  They are not afraid to tell their kid “non!”, and then the kid listens.  And is respectful, and obedient.  And well mannered and behaved.  At the ripe age of 1, they learn to greet people when they first see them.  We would go to restaurants and I would observe the children there — they do not negotiate with their parents, they do not throw food, they do not complain about what they are offered, they act like adults.  French adults, which means they can turn up their nose to poorly cooked meal, or anything American, cause they believe they are superior to everyone else.  Vive la republique!

Lyon is the capital of food in the country that is the world capital of food, and to say that I learned a bit about food over the weekend is like saying I knew what it was like to be pregnant before I ever was.  The food culture there is superior — there is such pride and dedication to make an effort to reinvent meals, use premium quality products, and offer the best culinary experience possible.  On our first day, we went to the market, where we had a 20 minute discussion with the cheese monger about local cheese.  And I sampled cheeses so stinky and wonderful that one actually turned my tongue numb.  And it was fantastic.  In the words of Justine — “you can tell it is good because you can feel your heart beating in your gums”.  If you don’t eat anything in your lifetime that fits that description, then you haven’t lived.

Pedram was dying with giddiness the whole weekend.  It made me realize how much he misses continental Europe — his comments were consistently about how classy the people were, how comfortable the pace of life is, and how wonderful it is to get fresh bread.  Every day.  And not from a special baker, but any boulangerie.  Because they are all good.  And we don’t need to buy extra for tomorrow, because tomorrow we will go back to the corner boulangerie and buy fresh baguettes.  Every day.  A la francaise.

Food, companionship, adorable french babies, smelly cheeses and baguettes aside, the highlight was probably a quick excursion to French Alps, where we all relaxed and enjoyed France’s natural beauty, soaking in the sun and snow and the wonderful homemade jams from Justine’s mom, along with the fresh bread that we got that morning.  Cause you know, France.

I ♥ Europe

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Ahh…the nostalgia of leaving the old continent.  I am going to miss our weekend travel adventures.  Some pictures of our visits:

A Frenchie Like None Other

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My lunch posse consists of Lisa, a fearless Cajun/Texan American who is fearless because:

1 – she has lived in Belgium for more than 5 years and still has her dignity.

2 – she gave birth to three children without an epidural (THREE TIMES) so that she could “feel what she was pushing”

and Sebastien — who is as french as a French male can be.  When I say he is French, it means a few things:

1 – he eats everything with a knife and fork, including fries

2 – he refuses to have lunch somewhere with cheap napkins

3 – everything great in this world is French

(and I haven’t seen it yet, but I am sure he wears his sweaters over his shoulders)

Being french also means he likes to take his time enjoying his lunch, so for my final few weeks we have been spending long lunches together.

We make a hilarious trio, and I will write more about our lunches…soon.

Today I asked Seb if he has changed at all after hanging with us two Americans so much and he said no.  But I find it hard to believe that seeing how Lisa and I exhibit behavior that is very non-French.  For example:

1 – We don’t like to wait — we are Americans, why wait for anything?  More than once, we have asked Seb to beckon a waiter (by yelling, waving his fork, etc) and asked them for — bread, a glass with ice in it, a slice of lemon, our food, to clear our plates, more bread, extra fries, another spoon, etc.

2 – Changes in our order.  Sebastien has asked waiters/chefs if they will substitute our croquettes for fries, the rice for pasta, the pasta for rice, fries instead of pasta, extra fries, etc.   Once at the “Man with Red Pants”, I think we incited a yelling match between the “Man with Red Pants” (waiter) and his wife (chef) over a change to the dish.

3 – We eat off each others plates, eat Seb’s fries, and sometimes take the fries (with our fingers) and dip it into whatever wonderful sauce is on his plate.  Without asking.  Ever.

I recall once trying to take a piece of my brother-in-law’s food and witnessing his snarl and growl made me realize that eating off each other’s plates is not particularly appreciated here.  This is also echoed by Pedram, who has waved the white flag of defeat and now does not voice any objections when I eat off his plate or ask him mid-way through the meal to change plates.

What is most touching about Sebastien’s attitude is how OPEN he is about us, our ideas, and our logic.  When we explain to him about the great American concept of instant gratification, he does not turn up his french nose and claim that Americans are fat slobs with an attention span of 4 year olds.  He is the only French person I know who refers to Europe as one community, as if the 27 states in Europe were a union or something.

Recently, Lisa told us of a dream where she came across 50 euros, and in her dream, she changed the 50 euro bill into ten 5 euro bills and distributed them to the homeless in Brussels.

Disclaimer:  there are not many homeless people in Brussels.  There is one by our office, and if I were ever to say “the homeless guy” — EVERYONE would know who I was talking about.  He has a cart full of stuff and lives near the square by our office.

A week after the dream, Lisa parked her car and found a 10 euro bill on the ground.  She immediately knew that she would have to give it to THE homeless guy.  Yesterday she spotted the homeless guy near the post office, and got our local translator, Sebastien, to come with her.

Sebastien, without hesitation, walked downstairs to the square where the post office was, and introduced himself and Lisa to the homeless man, and told him the entire story of Lisa and the dream.  He then asked the man if he would like the 10 euros, to which the homeless man said yes, and then Sebastien continued to translate while Lisa asked the homeless man if he was doing okay, and the homeless man asked Lisa where her wedding ring was.  And after a few minutes, they shook hands and said goodbye.

Today, Sebastien mentioned that this is not something he would have ordinarily done, and yes, after a year of spending time with us, he has changed a little bit.  And this made me happy.

Ryan Air Check In Fees for Americans (and other non-Europeans)

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We flew to Venice this past weekend with Ryan Air out of Charleroi, which was cheaper but quite the hassle.  Apparently Ryan Air is notorious for charging passengers for everything (they are potentially planning to charge for toilet use), so when buying the tickets, I had the option of free online check-in, rather than paying 10 euros/person/trip for airport check in.  BUT, when the time came, I found that Ryan Air does NOT accept non-European passports for online check-in, so I was forced to check in at the airport and pay 20 euros.

Again, I am discriminated against for being American ;)

When I asked at the airport where I could get a refund, I was told to check the Ryan Air website.  But NOWHERE on the Ryan Air site could I find informaton on refunding poor non-Europeans.  So I googled it, and surprise, there are MANY irate Americans/Norwegians/Australians, etc. with the exact same issue.  (a rant session about Euro discrimination?  How did I miss that one until now?)  I read this one by Meg who explains how to get your refund, and unlike many other bloggers, she was successful in getting her money back.

I will let you know if I ever see that 20 euros.  But more importantly, are there any type of discrimination laws that cover this?  Is it legal to charge someone for airport check-in when no other option is available and then burden you with figuring out how to get the money back?  One writer mentions that even the BLIND have to pay for check in at the airport.  I could make so much money suing companies here.

PS – My expectations for the flights were really low, but it was actually really good.  One 20 minute delay, otherwise, no real complaints.

PPS – Actually I change my mind – I have one complaint.  There is someone on the intercom trying to sell something/anything every 5 seconds.  You will not sleep on Ryan Air flights.

April 14 Update — I just received my refund electronically!

Other European Eating Habits

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The Dutch drink alot of milk.  When I was there for a training, we had cheese sandwiches everyday and to drink they brought cartons and cartons of milk.  All of the Dutch drank glass after glass of cold milk, which to me, was a bit bizarre.  But I guess that explains why they are known for being so tall.

The Belgians like having rabbits for pets, but they also enjoy eating rabbit.  At a dinner, every Belgian told me a story about how:

1 – As a child, their rabbit went missing one day, and that night they ate rabbit.

2 – Their rabbit eats all of the clothes, cables, furniture, etc. and poops everywhere.

3 – They threaten their children to clean up after the pet rabbit, or it will go “in the pot”.

It is weird to eat your pets?  Am I the only one that thinks so? 

Finally, a British co-worker who has been living in Belgium for 5 years and has a pet rabbit, told me the rabbit buying secret.  At the butcher, a rabbit costs 27 euros.  However, he discovered when buying his child a pet rabbit that at a pet store, a rabbit costs only 12 euros.  And he doesn’t mind “doing the deed” himself.

The longer I stay here, the closer I am to becoming a vegetarian.

Are you going to love me or eat me?

Are you going to love me or eat me?

Czech EU Artwork

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The European Union has a rotating 6-month presidency.  Starting in 2009, the Czech Republic prime minister, Mirek Topolánek, took the reigns over from French pres Sarkozy.  I never thought people would bemoan the loss of Sarkozy so much.  Apparently the Czech state (along with Ireland) is holding up the Lisbon Treaty, and the Czech leadership is full of EU-skeptics, who don’t really see the value of the Union.
So it is amusing, but not surprising, that the Czech commissioned art piece to celebrate the new presidency (installed in an EU building in Brussels) isn’t exactly Euro-friendly.  The artist decided to depict each of the major stereotypes of the 27 nations, occasionally hilarious, often offensive.  Here are some of them:

germany1

Germany is shown as a country of Autobahns (some say that the form of the highways is close to that of a swastika — I don’t see it)

bulgaria

The most controversal depiction is that of Bulgaria, which is a country full of “Turkish toilets”.  The Bulgarians demanded an explanation and an apology, and now there is a black sheet covering the art.

france

France is shown as a country on strike (ha! how appropriate.)

the-netherland

The Netherlands is shown as flooded, with only the mosque minarets above water (there is a great deal of controversy of how that country treats its Islamic population)

You can see more of the great masterpiece (Belgium is a chocolate box, Luxembourg a golden nugget, etc)  by Czech artist David Cerny here and read the descriptions here.  He defends his work as comical, and thinks critics should lighten up.  The EU president (Czech prime minister) claims that the art piece is all about letting go of stereotypes and becoming more tolerant.

And where is England?  The original Euro-skeptics are purposely left out of the exhibit, portraying their reluctance to fully embrace the Union (top left corner).

entropa

Bonne Annee 2009 – office version

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In case you didn’t know, there are a few times when your co-workers will come and try to kiss you in Europe.  One is on your birthday.  The second is when you return to the office for the first time after new years. (and in some parts of France, you kiss to say hello and goodbye to everyone in the office, everyday)

I didn’t know this, so I passed all my colleagues and sat at my desk.   “Bonne Annee!!” I yelled through the corridors.  How tacky I am.

I realized my error when Sebastien, a French friend, came to say hello, and kept coming closer and closer.  Once he was in my “space”, I said to him, “what are you doing?”  He replied, “I am giving new year kisses”.  And then we gave each other 4 bisous.

For the French, it could be as much as four.  The Belgian will kiss you three times.  Twice for the Italians, and twice for the Spanish.  Everyone else, it is a very awkward 1-5 kisses, with the occasional unintentional too-close-to-the-mouth kiss that will be followed by a HUGE step back.  The kisses apply to anyone you see for the first time in the new year until the end of the month.

I actually kinda liked it, so when Sebastien stopped by on Tuesday, I got up and said, “aren’t we going to kiss again?” and he looked at me like I was crazy.  Note to self – one (series of) kisses per customer per year. 

Sending Euro kisses to everyone from afar.

Welcoming the fall

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Some pictures from the past few days:

Teeth – American vs. British teeth

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Confession – I haven’t been to a dentist yet here.  In general, even though medical care is quality and ridiculously cheap, I am wary of going to a doctor when we don’t share the same mother tongue.  Also, dentists don’t x-ray every year here, only once…ever.  Plus they don’t do the fluoride clean when you go visit.  Plus people’s teeth here are a little scary.  Plus, Americans are slightly obsessed with teeth.  Plus I am a brat.

Funny enough, I not alone in seeing the difference between American teeth and the rest of the world.  You know it is bad when Americans think British actors are wearing false teeth to make a point, and the British actor actually isn’t.  So maybe it is more of a British thing.  But when I asked Barnaby about the stereotype, he said he had never heard of it before and made me feel like a dork for bring it up.

I remember first hearing about this in the SNL sketch from the 90′s “Hedley and Wyche” with Mike Myers and Chris Farley.  Also the dentist in the Simpsons uses the big book of British teeth to scare Lisa into getting braces.  And certain modern druggy British singers aren’t helping.

To protest the stereotype, I don’t necessarily think that the British or Belgians have horrible hygiene, just they drink alot of tea/coffee and don’t care so much about a gap forming in between their two front teeth.  Or if this gap creates a weird whistling noise that makes me panic in a work meeting, thinking that there is a dying cat wheezing behind the heater, when really my co-worker doesn’t have to open his mouth to breath, he can just reveal his two front teeth.  

On the other hand, I completely acknowledge that Americans are a little too obsessed with their teeth.  Sanding veneers and bleaching?  Madness. 

PS – When I described this phenomenon to a Belgian co-worker, she mentioned that at least British may have bad teeth, but the Americans are fat, which is a bigger deal if you are vain. 

Ahhh, yes…fat Americans.  That argument will NEVER get old…

Olympics in Europe

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A few thoughts about watching the Olympics in Brussels:

I can watch the events in French, Flemish, Dutch, German and Spanish — I don’t speak Spanish, but I could watch the track events blindfolded and still understand everything that was going on — those announcers have serious lungs! 

Europeans show many events I have never seen before, like weightlifting, handball, judo, and badminton.  Yes, badminton is a fierce Olympic sport.  I’ll never look at a “birdie” the same way again.

The French channels only show the competitions where France has participated, and the non-French channels like to show the French losing.  The one French swimmer who came in 7th place and was crying about it — they replayed that over and over on the Belgian stations. 

More than once, we have discussed with Spanish friends if Spain is unjustly perceived as a xenophobic and racially insensitive nation.  They argued that it is only a “few” people who paint their faces black and make monkey noises at sport events when competing against black teams.  But what about this Olympic ad — where the national men’s and women’s teams are making the “squinty eye” gesture before going to China?  How many people were involved in producing this ad — and how come none of them objected?  (especially Lakers player Pau Gasol – how is he going to go back to LA now?)

Marca Ad

Hope their soccer team will not try to recreate this before the World Cup in South Africa. 

I miss the heart wrenching stories narrated by Bob Costas.  I didn’t cry once this Olympics…

Belgians look forward to winning one medal, in anything.  Too many times they won 4th place, just short of getting on the board.  They all almost died of relief when their women’s 4×100 track team won the silver (but that felt almost out of default, since everyone else practically did not finish).  But the best was Tia Hellebaut, a long legged Belgian won the GOLD a day before the closing ceremony.  Yeah!  Belgians have a gold medal, and they still exist as a country!!